Slowly, I get to know new friends, new classmates, even the juniors. They're not as bad as I thought, it turned out to be the other round.. as usual, I always guess it wrong. When I thought :"Hey this dude is great or that chick is awesome~" In the end, the person that I thought 'cool' was awful and the person that have me bad first impression became my closest friends. I'll always remember that 'never judge a book by its cover' from now onwards.
I hate KL, I told Fui Shan :"Why do I have to suffer like this?" She'll say:"Someone out there is worst than you but they just don't give up, why?" Then I need to ask myself why... I just don't get it. I hate this place cause it not my territory, whenever I got bullied I can't do anything cause I don't fucking belong here... nearly everyday I recite :"I hate this place, can I go back?" Sad thing is I can't, I have to be here, always look forward and not back. I hate KL cause every time I go out I need to go with public transport, and everything is just expensive, I got lost more than twice, I walked more than 20 minutes without knowing where am I... Damn! I just hate this place!
Fui Shan, Adi & me, fooling around at work...Each day I go to work I learned new things, each day I wake up I see new things, each day I go college I do new things... it has become more and more interesting, living in KL is part of my life. It's not what I hate anymore, because I realized that to achieve what I want next time I need to do what I have to do, so that I can do what I want to do. Not much people can read what I think, but I got a special friend that can guess what I think, it wasn't nice I thought at first, I like to keep things by myself, I prefer to be mysterious, let others ponder. He said something that makes me rethink what I want to do, or will do... I learned that experience... in order to gain experience... that process was painful but... after you learned from that experience, you are someone.
I can't regret, Fui Shan always tell me, :"Do not regret what you chose, live with it." But that feeling of resentment will come each day when I'm down, I can only say "I can't regret, I won't..."
It is a bittersweet day today, I've got great friends, great colleagues, I sense greater things are coming... I love all of you, I love everything!
Gosh~! What am I writing?? As though I'm going somewhere and never come back~~!!
Fui Shan trying something new...
I've been dieting for years, the most successful ever was at 51kg, everybody said I get thinner already. Now, my weight just keep fluctuating, I'm seeking that long lost inspiration, what had inspired me so much that I can restraint myself... Sigh~ I need that motivation back! I don't want to be fat until die... I don't want to commit suicide(I have to marry Jay Chou), I don't want to get diabetes, no high blood pressure etc.. So I say... let gambate Beng & Ann!!
I went to Shangri-La hotel, came back with ache heart, broke, fail to meet that expectations that I wanted... Am I asking too much?
Getting back to work was fun, I started working on the 20th, the same day that our 3rd semester start. The new sem wasn't nice, Mrs.Amara hubby passed away(so sorry), so we got 3 days of class cancelled. Aroused at first, but then only to realize the worst, she replaced nearly the whole sem class! I heard a lot of interesting stories from classmates, saying how 'interesting' the class was, until everyone falls asleep, some were chatting, some listening to Mp3, some were starring at the walls... I can already imagine that, as though I was there. I can't wait for the coming tuesday class, Pengajian Malaysia... I'm gonna make that class interesting!!
I was furious that she arrange lousy replacement class for us, without discussing with us... She replaced it on Friday and Saturday, I promised to come to work at 1pm on Friday, I hate Saturday classes cause they're wasting my time and money, I skipped today's class but I can't do that all the time... I just fucking hate Friday classes!
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